Saturday, October 11, 2008

Mystery Dog From Labrador

So, lately I have been complaining about my miserable love life. Just because I got the fix doesn't mean I am not up for some afternoon delight folks. Jeesh! So I jotted out a short plea and dashed to some friends. I included a brief "likes/dislikes" list ala Hef and got this back.

I am not sure WHY someone was trying to pawn this kook off on me. I am a thrill seeking water dog. This one? It seems his only obsession is keeping his fur perfectly dry and coifed! I can only conclude that this mutt is from the loins of one Jimmy Johnson of Hurricane and Cowboy fame.

God. Me can'ts stand a prima donna. Or is that primo donna? Oh well, it doesn't matter. Look who I am talking about. Poor stoneless creature. Another reason to think he is Jimmy's... Sigh.


Friday, October 10, 2008

WHAT???

NO! I do not do tricks! I am not a dog! Did you not read the title of my blog? Jeesh!
No, I will not roll over!
Shake What?
You play dead! ..... nervy so-and-so....



What have you there? A treat??

Did I mention that you are looking lovely in those grannie panties and your tie-dyed Grateful Dead Tee?
No?
I was remiss! You are a vision.

Did you have something in that hand you wanted to share?

xx

Huh? What? What do you think you are doing? Treats go IN the mouth not ON the nose.

What do you mean don't eat it Zoe?
What sort of torture game you playin' you crazy long haired freak!?!

OK What?
Do the trick?
OH!

I have no shame... I am a treat Langolier!

Bring Your Fan to Work Day!!!

Here is where it all happens. Yes, it is a bit chaotic, but hey, anyone can function in an organized environment. It takes real skill to bring home the bacon (mmmm.... bacon) in this hovel.

So first thing I do when I come to the office (besides suck down a cuppa then visit the ladies) is I check the sitch with my investments. So, log on, get to my yahoo front page, click on my portfolio...

Oh holy shit hit the fan! ACK! I cannot bear to look at the devastation! The agony!

What? Who is the Chicken Little you speak of? My name is Zoe! Huh? What? I most certainly am not an alarmist!


_________ Kisses Hugs__________Hugs Kisses___________



A bit of Zoe wisdom:
In times of trouble and turmoil, stick to what you know and what makes sense!

Sell CAT

Buy DOG


'nuf said. Now go home. Arf!

Grillmaster Zee

Zee The Philosopher

Sometimes you are the victor...

Zoebert The Blonde: Consider yourself conquered devil stick! Hazzah!



And at other times the spoils...

Galileo the Bone: Stand down Naive!

Vulcan Mind Meld

Or the Borg. Nobody is sure yet.


All's we know for sure is that there seems to be disagreement on whether poop and vomit are OK to eat and whether toilet paper is really necessary when there is a perfectly servicible tongue. Knowing the parts... the sum will probably not find agreement. Are they on the brink of a revolution? Stay tuned...